I was recently blessed with the honor of becoming a Guest Blogger on a site primarily for family members of the alcoholic. If you would like to read it please visit: The Immortal Alcoholic!
Quite a while ago I wrote a post on Parents, I use it in my workbook as well. There is such a conflict that goes on with alcoholics and addicts. For every human being we have a need to make sense of things. Our brain searches for meaning in every experience, we must make sense of things. For the alcoholic/addict we often tend especially in treatment and into early recovery to look for “BLAME” for our situation. We blame our family, the “disease”, and trauma to name a few.
This is natural, in fact, we continue to have treatment providers lead us down this path, only they do not realize they are doing it! In order to recover ,we must alleviate the “Blame-Game”. We need to come to the place that, “It is what it is” ! For those of us afflicted with the “Creature”, it just doesn’t matter if alcoholism or addiction is genetic, environmental, learned, a moral issue, an allergy or anything in between! The only thing that matters is the realization that if I use, I lose! It is my life that is heading south, of course others are effected in a big way, but it is my life that is wasted.
There is no need to blame, it is counter productive. We need to accept that we are an addict or alcoholic and do something radical about it. We need to humble ourselves and allow the ones “WE” hurt to have their say, to speak their word and feelings. We need not respond in word, we need to respond in action. Whether they are right or wrong it matters least. We need to work on and in our recovery. Nothing less will suffice!
Life is too good to waste in a bottle, smoking, eating or shooting! We are here for a flicker, we need to make it happen in our lives and fulfill our potential and destiny! We are smarter than the average bear! So we need to admit our challenge, focus on our destiny, clean our house, seek forgiveness by making amends, forgive ourselves and others, and move forward!
Go, Go, Go…